A L'il Note of Thanks...

Wow, that was great…after such long time..coming by and posting that and my blogiends responded to it…and tht too quick…Strangely, some error with my network is not letting me post response to your comments as reply comments… By the by, I started reading each of your blogs too…and as I said earlier wasn’t able to post in my comments…As soon as I was trying to submit comments, it says Internet Explorer cannot open the internet site…grrrr... So let me thank each of you who took out some time to read thru and comment….

@ Bikram – Thanks Bikram…Sure, dear…I wud heed to the advice…I wud try my best to be regularly ranting about my life…I restarted reading your blogs…yippeeee to me…Bikram, don’t bother yourself by thinking any logic from these news u hear or see on TV… You know, what I do to avoid such instances…I just avoid News channels..hehe!!! My bro always get irritated when he see me never watching News…and at times ridicule me for my insensitivity to Politics or Budget or such… Why worry when I have NO voting authority in the place I reside…Why worry when I am already worrying how to bring the two ends meet in that month’s budget…I might be an idiot…but I prefer, first living for myself and family and then for others…

@ Tomz – What to test…Ha…I came in, didn’t wanted to disturb u all…So just said few words and left…By the by, read your post on Unfinished Bldg…grrr…I thought, u gonna tell some horror story…And I was imagining the apartment of Shalini and Madhav in the movie Alayipayuthe…it was cool, but then personally speaking, I wudnt want to walk those stairs up alone any time of the day or night…lol!!! And hey, You tube is blocked at my office…So cudnt watch your video…wud do it whenever I get some time at home… and All the best…really hope that girl herself see your blog…hehe!! In between, Thanks for checking me out…

@ Makk – Thanks buddy…for being around… Ur poems r sweet…but I really strain myself to dust out my Hindi reading skills..lol!!! and to respond in Hindi wud be like murdering ur poem…

This was a little thanks giving post…I will be posting something soooooonn…it’s a promise to myself …again….

Luv u all...

Ok, I agree, I am lazy and too lazy…I wanted to be one who doesn’t die in hibernation in the blog world…even if none reads my blog, I wanted to write something or everything regularly…but then…I got lazy…maybe not lazy lazy..but busy to think of something to write…life was eventful the past few months…ofcourse…still I had no idea why I couldn’t get myself to sit and jot down about my life…hmm…maybe bcoz, the day when I started writing this blog, I was extremely upset and the main idea of my blog was to outpour my feelings..my sorrows…and remember some happy moments too…but…what a miracle, a job change could do…I am soo much at ease and mental peace…its been years tht I have started working…this might be the first place where I don’t mind going daily and work…I felt wanted in this place and happy…naturally my mind was light now and so I had nothing to outpour…lol!!!!

But then I realize, this blog was the one who really stood by me to relieve my mood, tensions or pressure…how could I ignore when I am happy…a good friend is someone who stand by u even during your sorrows and happiness… So I decided..hereafter…I would come by and talk atleast smthing to my sweet little blog…

So guys…hope u all r doing fine..seriously, a big sorry for not coming over to ur blogs for this long and letting u know I am alive…I am alive and after years I feel I am living too…Cool na…so please be happy thinking.. “Ha, atleast we don’t have to read and get bored with Jzt4me’s long and neverending confusing posts…”…Ok, now, please say NO…my posts are nice…Guys, afterall, I am sweet and funny na…and too confusing too…that s best about me…right???

Let me remember some of my regular mates from the blog world today…

How r u doing, Dost? Sorry…tht I am being such an insensitive idiot tht I don’t keep in touch… Just too engrossed in stuffs I am doing under my new umbrella of responsibilities…I will surely, see to it tht I keep in touch..atleast once a month..haa!!!

Bikrammmmm, I know you are busy too…but then responsible enuf to keep all your ardent followers updated about you and ur life…I failed miserably…But, I thank u a lot for being a sweet fellow and visiting my blog even if I myself visited after months…You are sweet indeed…I would soon sit in front of this system and go through all ur posts…atleast the recent ones and update myself…hmmm….

Makk…You too never failed to show your support to me and my posts…u did let me know wht u felt about wht I grumbled every now and then at my blog…thanks dear…but when I try reading ur posts the only problem was…to read Hindi and respond accordingly is a bit of a horror for me…you see, I learnt hindi for the purpose of passing the public exam…hehe!!! I do understand the language, but…haaa, that but is a biggggg but….

Tomz….long time uhh??? God knows why…the last few times, I tried getting into ur blog…it gave me and error…and thts how I got far away from ur blog…even as I type this, I am trying to open ur blog…and all tht I can see is your banner and after that is stuck…Hadippaaaa, it worked…it worked…maybe my system decided to give up on my tantrums and excuses….grrr…Lol, think I should read ur blog…sounds like a bit Ghostish…wow….

How could I miss Pal Pal Dil ke Paas...who been reading my blogs and not seeing me writing anything asked me..."Why u r not writing any more"...and I said.."bcoz I am happy now...and at mental peace...I was writing when I was off in my mood.." and he said... "No, if u had decided to write...do tht even when u r sad or happy...and try to maintain that habit of writing...it makes a big difference..." ... Thanks dear...for tht inspirational advice...

Okkk…now I had drafted the above 2 days back and never got a chance to post it…before I get stuck with stuffs that can erase my memory off..lemme post this down…Thanks once again to each and every one of u who been a great support to me during my hard times and been following my blogs…Love you all…

I shall never change...

I had borrowed my cousin’s scooter for my early morning temple visits. So as I rode out of that temple premise; suddenly I heard a voice, “Child, you are blessed with all talents…”… I was a bit surprised… The scooter was automatically stopped as I looked to my right side to see who said that…I saw a man by the road side with a Parrot…He was a Card reader… The tensions in my mind was so depressing that I was ACTUALLY looking for some comfort or solution or positive support from somewhere..As always; I decided to try knowing what is in store for me…As u all know, I believe strongly in astrology and palmistry and all…

I parked the scooter on the road side, right near him…and sat on a stone paved foot path in front of the parrot… I had a completely blank face, smiling hard, embarrassed at myself for sitting there on that road side… That was a first time for me…I always had some relatives with me… As soon as, I sat there…he continued…

“Child, u were destined to see me today… u have come to the goddess’ abode asking for some peace of mind… you did everything u could… but still u r not happy…u dint step out of her premise with the least amount of satisfaction…”
I smiled…

“U smile as if u have NO Worries…but that’s a charade u had put ON from the day u were born… u would never part with that smile, even if u might scream with pain… U are waiting for a positive reply…A Job change is right near you… You would change your job within a month…That is 100% fixed…But before that you would be writing an exam for that job change…”

I was surprised…Yeah, Job change is right…but exam..Naaah…I am already done with interview and assessment and all… All that was remaining was a positive reply from my old office and to join the new place ON time… (but, within a day, I knew, what he said was right…bcoz the very evening, the HR staff from the new place called me and informed me that she is sending me a link for an Online Assessment… I need to complete the test ASAP….)

And so he continued…Trust me friends..even if I wasn’t a believer, that day, I would have started believing astrology or atleast his talent in telling the most confidential phase of my life…as if he was part of my life through out… He didn’t ask for big amount of money or anything… He just said, “the next time u come to this temple; u would not have to fake a smile…u would be genuinely happy…and that day; offer a lamp for the Goddess as a token of Thanks..”

At that point, I wondered, will I ever be able to happily enter the temple premises… Bcoz it seemed close to impossible then…But today I know, I would be going there happily the next time I go to that city…atleast, I wouldn’t be sad thinking of the unhappy situation I had faced at my old office…

I really wanna share with u some of the most surprising things that he said about me…which nobdy can discover within 5 minutes of seeing me…

1. Your son gets the love of 02 mothers…could be ur mother or mother in law…He cares for the other mother more than he cares for u… (TRUE, grrrr….)
2. You were supposed to be one out 3 kids for your parents…But in existence; u will have only 1 brother…. (True, my mom had done an abortion before me…hmm…)
3. Your brother cares for your son like a father and your son is attached to your brother more than he could be with his own father. (True…)
4. You have got a very keen Sixth sense; but none around u heed to your words until and unless they realize it in the hard way… (True True…)
5. You have never had any positive vibe from your In Laws…in fact, You just do what u shd be doing…unfortunately for everything u do for them, never expect anything good in return…you wouldn’t even get love from them…

The more he said, the belief inside me was growing more…How could somebody say so precisely about things in a stranger’s life…He dint promise big things…but then, as I left him that day…eventhough, my tensions stayed as it was before..still I had a hope… IF HE IS RIGHT, then… all my problems will be soon over… Co-incidence or not; as soon as I was back from vacation; I got my release from my old office and I am sitting happily at my new place now…
Do you wanna know; what was that one thing he told me that really made me think hard…he said..

“Child…whatever happen…WHATEVER….never do 3 things in ur life…bcoz these r the three things that can turn hazardous to u….
1. Don’t get angry…(I knew it…as anger was one thing that was really making me uncontrollable)
2. Never cry… (uhmmm…that’s true…bcoz, the moment I cried, I turned weak and vulnerable…I always faced every problems with my stubborn confidence…)
3. Never give a single penny with your hand to ANYBODY…not even as a gift… (How true, bcoz every single person whom I had considered the best f my friends, once I lend money to them during their hard times…just disappeared…Losing the money was not the pain..but realizing the truth of a Person who I had considered as a GOOD FRIEND was not a good feeling…)”

But then on a lighter note, It is not good for me to lend money to anybody…But, Hey…I can borrow…from ANYBODY…

Hey guys, I know, you would have 101 thoughts and anti slogans for my belief…but please trust me…this is my belief and I am not going to change…lol!!!

I shall never change…

Bribing the Almighty...

Touch wood, things in my life r going in a normal way with not much negative stuffs to worry about …the back pain and the allergy issues do disturb me at times..but I can manage them now, as I am emotionally happy…yipeeeee…Do u remember myself talking to u all about my belief in Astrology…uhmm…these r the moments, when my belief gets stronger…Hey, Dint I tell u about my encounter with the Astrologer during my vacation 2 months back???Oho…I missed that…I shdnt have…I know, many of u doesn’t really have much belief in such things…but I would wanna stick to my personal choice…OK???

So, as u all know, last June, was the month I had this new job offer and I was almost happy…but something was bugging me inside that I couldn’t believe that, ATLAST, I gonna get out of that environment…with much better prospects… Something in me was not letting me be HAPPY and my friend was continuously assuring me…”WHY WORRY..SEE, EVERYTHING IS FINE…U GOT THE OFFER, U SIGNED THE CONTRACT…NOW U GO FOR UR VACATION AND WHEN U COME BACK U START AFRESH AT THE NEW PLACE…”…True…but, something wasn’t right…I felt…My Sixth Sense maybe…

Exactly 1 day before I was flying off for vacation, a call from my HR (my old company)…. The tone was not so encouraging… OUTLINE… ‘I can’t leave the company…atleast for another 2 months…and also I can’t go on leave during my Notice period…I can utilize my leave balance, maybe during the 2nd month of my notice period…’…NOWWWW…I was devastated…my New company wanted to me to start with them ASAP…and these people wont let me go before 2 months…I was lost…I felt, I am losing my present job and also the new job offer…I was like almost pleading while I requested the HR to help me sort it out with much damage…hmmm…Anyways, thanks to the HR Director…she asked me to go on leave as I had some Doctor’s appointments too to take care of…

But, the uncertainty on my job front was eating me throughout… That’s what I had mentioned in one of my earlier post… I felt, Now ONLY God could help me…I literally stepped into the Temples with weeping hearts… (u can understand what big a trauma I was in, then…)…Not a single person around me ever realized that…As I always had those smiling, laughing stature…Why make them worry, that’s what I always followed…So naturally, Temples were the only resort for me to outpour my emotions, fears and sorrows…Hoping, he, the almighty would help me out…

I went to each place…Enquiring to every person at the temple, for the different rituals that I could do to remove all obstacles in my life…for any special prayers to remove tensions from my life…and what not…Literally, I was bribing God, the almighty…IF U HELP ME WITH THIS, I WOULD DO THIS and THAT…hmm…I thought of it in that way…AM I DOING WRONG by taking up this way…Can gods be bribed…

Uhm… Anyways…whatever it was… He was my final Hope…and I decided to leave everything in his hands… Somewhere deep inside, I kept on giving him different Offers…”IF this…then that…”… I offered any rituals that was considered auspicious at every temple I visited…Prayed soo hard…I felt better..but not Best…As I stood in front of those Idols of my Spiritual Beliefs…I was literally talking to them..as if I was to my own mother…

“God, u know na..what is happening…Its too troublesome for me..Pls do smthing, na…I cant take this tension anymore…I don’t wanna end up losing my new job…it’s a good one…Sort it out…Soon…before I return after my vacation..solve the problems…OK???”

And so on went the One-sided conversations…As I exited each of those temple doors, I turned and looked at them…as if to remind them one last time NOT to forget my issue…hmmm…and it was at the steps of one such temple…I found him..or lemme say…

HE FOUND ME…