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Thursday, July 31, 2014

Nothing is Permanent...

Whenever we take a new step in life, it seems to be a new hope…a new phase, a new beginning… If we go back to the past of this blog… it is very evident that I wrote a lot when I was going thru one of the most terrible period…Let me say, not the worst, still psychologically a tough period. But then, in a day, my life changed and I was floating in peace…inspite of all the explosions or riots that happened around me, I was still at peace…I was calm and my mind was free to just go in the flow…

Thus I realized, I can blog only when I am in pressure… and in tht new phase, the pressure was lesser than the required level for blogging…lol!!! But then, years later…it has happened…all of a sudden, at one moment, I was pushed back into a whirlpool…and I am trying to actually first get hold of the ground or something to hang on…Only then can I start thinking, how to come out of this or should I just let go off…

Life is indeed strange. We make plans for a future that we are not sure of. I too did. I thought, or believed that the calmness that was over me was permanent and I can stride thru life just like a cool breeze. I had this idiotic belief that, NOW, nothing can go wrong. I made plans…plans that spread for many years ahead. I assured those who were around me, that I am there for them. I will be there for them. But now, today, I wonder…When I am not even sure of whats gonna happen to those plans I had, how am I gonna be there for those who think I wud be there…

We say, "see you soon" whenever we bid goodbye…What make u say that? The belief that you are gonna be alive till that next meeting, but… When you borrow money, you say, “will give it to you by next month”, but…When you plan the future of your kids, you say, “This is good for you”, but…

Ok, so, eventhough I am not depressed, I am worried. I am not upset for the change in my life’s phase, but I am angry at the circumstances. I am not thinking what next, but I am wondering why I am not thinking. I can see, in front of me is all those road map that I had planned and set with the over confidence I had…I thought, nothing gonna happen till I achieve the goals. I will be safe, but now... I am not. 

It feels as if I am there, "Standing in the middle of the world’s busiest road, not knowing, should I run to my left or the right or just stand here". I gotta take a decision and that too soon before I loose control of all the ends of the strings I am holding on to. Yes, I have too many strings to take care of and I can or should never forget that...

No worries, this too will pass…I have seen worser days, and I have come out of it victoriously…I have come thru much difficult phases…I have fought bigger battles…I have swam much deeper oceans…And during all those moments, God had sent me angels… and their hands helped me come out of all of them…I am sure, this time too, God will send an Angel…as always a new one, a new revelation in a different form…As I realize, even the angels that come in for my help are not same, they too change…Am I not right, when I say…

Nothing is permanent!!!