Bring it onnnn...

If I am asked to define “My Life”… I have a very apt picture to explain it…

“Life is a Battlefield and myself a warrior fighting; not to conquer but survive”

But the recent blow has left me with some serious wounds… I need medicines and God’s blessings to come out of it without much permanent disabilities. Never saw it coming, but, now I have accepted the reality…Adjusted to this life, a new life that I am experiencing now… not that bad, unless I think of all the difficulties that is at the end of this period…

These days had to come, for me to realize what it is that I needed… it was “Rest”. True, its been years now that I have been fighting many battles to survive. I had learnt in my life that only the bravest could survive and Darwin’s theory proved right for me, “Survival of the Fittest”. I fought thru many phases of my life and I was tired. But never knew it, till now when I actually got some time to rest…

But then, too much rest leads to laziness and then the mind starts getting empty…Empty enough for more thoughts to come in and it wouldn’t take much time to be a Devil’s workshop…I am seeing those days too, when my thoughts go sooo wild and horrid that I end up getting into a depressive mode. Unfortunately, as always, I cant show it out, bcoz a change in mode means a change in many connective links… The moment I let such a negative thought win over me, no theories can help me anymore and this was something that life had taught me.

Now the irony of it all... I know that myself getting adjusted or acquainted to these days is not a good sign. I can already see why…Yes, I am getting sooooooo used to it, that I am loving it and is now dreading going back to the battle field which I had temporarily left due bruises. I cant avoid the going back…If not today, tomorrow I should go back bcoz the battle is not yet over… Maybe it has to go for more time for which an end date is not yet confirmed. I know, as of now I am tired and needs rest so that I can revive myself and go back with double the strength.

Ok, let me put all those thoughts off. For time being, I prefer staying calm and regain my lost energy and confidence. Just hope and pray that whenever I go back, I go back in the best of my spirits and power and the next come back be after I have won the most important battle. I hope for a peaceful life after that final battle.

Somebody told me that he is the master of his life and live it the way he wants and never plan anything and just face it as it comes. Good for him, atleast no disappointments due disrupted plans or broken expectations. I too wish I could take life unprepared. I doubt if I can ever do that, but still I will try to control myself from making any more advance calculations, lol!!! Atleast for time being “No more plannings or no more road maps”…

So, my dear life… this is all I have got to tell you…

Bring it onnnnnnn!!!