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Sunday, August 19, 2018

More to go...


I always believe and remind my son that the divorce was between a husband and wife and his parents will still stand together for all his needs. I kept trying to cover-up for all the short-falls his father continued doing even at this stage of life. I still ensured to remind his father on how to be a good father and how to build their relation. It is a sad truth that it never came from his heart.

I always believed in incorporating all family values in him. That day, as we were checking in for our return flight, I dialled his paternal grandmother for him to talk to her. She never had much to talk. It was always a formality conversation with her unless there was something that she had to be bitter about. Their conversation didn’t last long, as usual, my son said his regular Hi – How r u -  questions and then heard him saying SHE IS HERE. I WILL ASK HER TO CALL YOU.

As we crossed security, he mentioned that his grandmother wanted to speak to me and I should call her back. Though, I always considered her as my mother, somehow she could never do that. For sure, I knew this was where her son got his selfish characteristics. Hence, I knew well that a conversation with her would never be pleasant. Still, not wanting my son to feel bad, I made the call at the boarding gates. My heart was beating fast.

Hello…

Hello Amma.

Ohhhhhhh, Madammm… Why are you going so fast. Why are you not staying in that house? You took that house in your name, aaaaalllll for yourself? Why don’t you stay there for many days? You have already done the exorcism to remove the spirit from your life…

What Spirit, Amma! [It hurt, knowing the spirit she meant was my husband or should I say ex-husband].

Why don’t you stay there for many days?

No Amma, I have things to be done…

You have terminated your partner from his job. You can live in that house all for yourself. You don’t have to bother about him anymore. You got the house in your name. Although it was always in your name. Still. You should have stayed long. Now the boy who I got after praying hard to get a boy child has become an orphan. He lost his father and his mother. I wanted him for my things. But now, I don’t need him anymore.

She had a few more harshness to spit and then the call got disconnected from the other end with a Thank you Madam.

I didn’t expect anything better. I always knew that thru this process, her only worry was the losing of the house that I had built on bank loans all around me. During the bargain, his son wanted a share of the house with ZERO obligations on the loan that I had to pay for next 20years. I was fine to give off the house as a whole with no compensation for me if he was ready to take up the loan responsibilities. But he preferred a profit in it and expected to own it without paying for it. I denied and hence the house still stayed under my ownership - the only one asset I had. So she was mainly showing her displeasure of losing an asset - a physical property - A house. 

No surprised. But her talking about my son, really hurt me. I had to clarify few things, but to his father and not her. Hence, I called him,

“I understand amma is hurt. But no one else is hurt as much as me. Please remind her that our son has not lost his parents. As long as my son needs me, I will be there for him. As long as you wanna be with him, I will never stop you either. Please make your mother understand this much.”

As always, he argued that his mother will never say such things. I was relieved that this time I had the conversation recorded (a process I started doing since the day she had first called to abuse me over my decision). When I mentioned that I can give him proof, he changed tones. “Maybe, mom said something. But she forgot.” Isnt it strange that people can forget things within minutes. Good for her.

The journey back was quiet. My son who was watching and over hearing the conversation felt bad too. All he said was, “Amma, I am sorry for making you call her. If she doesn’t need me,  I will never go there again.”

“No baby, he is your grandmother. She is now upset with amma. That’s why. If your father wants to take you there, you should go happily. They are also part of your family.”

At age 10, how much could he understand, I don’t know. Regretting with all heart that I had to put him thru this mess, I consoled him.

But atleast, that call was end of another relation too. A one-sided mother daughter relation…

More to go…

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